"You will only begin to heal when you let go of past hurts.
FORGIVE those who have wronged you
and learn to FORGIVE yourself for your mistakes."
~ Unknown
FORGIVE those who have wronged you
and learn to FORGIVE yourself for your mistakes."
~ Unknown
forgive
fəˈɡɪv/
verb
verb: forgive; 3rd person present: forgives; past tense: forgave; gerund or present participle: forgiving; past participle: forgiven
fəˈɡɪv/
verb
verb: forgive; 3rd person present: forgives; past tense: forgave; gerund or present participle: forgiving; past participle: forgiven
- stop feeling angry or resentful towards (someone) for an offence, flaw, or mistake.
- no longer feel angry about or wish to punish (an offence, flaw, or mistake).
- cancel (a debt).
- used in polite expressions as a request to excuse one's foibles, ignorance, or impoliteness.
- no longer feel angry about or wish to punish (an offence, flaw, or mistake).
Let's be clear about something right away - if you are not willing to forgive yourself for your mistakes, big or small, don't expect to be able to forgive others for theirs or to receive forgiveness from others. You won't recognise forgiveness if it hit you with a 10 ton truck.
Before you even continue to read please take a moment to sit down with pen and paper and write the words "I forgive myself for.... " and then list all the things you think you need forgiveness for. Read it out loud to yourself in the mirror and then say at the end "I forgive myself". Just those words - "I forgive myself". Then move on. (Have a little bonfire with those reams of papers while you moving on)
By being willing to forgive myself I have been able to forgive others. I have moved away from holding a grudge and as a result now have a greater sense of peace in my life then I did a year ago.
Forgiveness isn't easy, whether it is towards ourselves or others. Also the sweet irony that is life means it sometimes calls on us to be the 'better' person (yes just like when your Mom told you to be the better person and turn the other cheek away from the playground bully, that kind of better person).
We have to learn to accept that we'll never receive the apology we felt we needed in order to make sense of the bad things that happened to us and we have to decide to offer up forgiveness regardless and let it go.
I know that kind of forgiveness in particular isn't easy. I have people in my life that make my skin crawl with the knowledge that I've had to be the better person. I forgave them - it doesn't mean I forgot what they did. I didn't say if you forgave someone that it meant you had to have them back in your life (okay some you can't get rid of but there are others you can cut ties with). But forgiveness puts you in control of the boundary between yourself and the person causing you harm. Boundaries mean you get decide what you will allow in your life and in that way you protect yourself.
But besides all of the above, and what I really want to say here is that forgiving yourself first is the most important step.
Even if it takes you a long time to find forgiveness for others please just learn to forgive yourself. You will make mistakes, big and small, but mistakes nonetheless. If we learn to ease up a little on ourselves then we will learn to live in the present moment and appreciate the moment rather then constantly beating ourselves up over mistakes we've made in the past or being to afraid to move forward for fear of what we may do wrong in the future.
I forgive myself.
Love Always
Before you even continue to read please take a moment to sit down with pen and paper and write the words "I forgive myself for.... " and then list all the things you think you need forgiveness for. Read it out loud to yourself in the mirror and then say at the end "I forgive myself". Just those words - "I forgive myself". Then move on. (Have a little bonfire with those reams of papers while you moving on)
By being willing to forgive myself I have been able to forgive others. I have moved away from holding a grudge and as a result now have a greater sense of peace in my life then I did a year ago.
Forgiveness isn't easy, whether it is towards ourselves or others. Also the sweet irony that is life means it sometimes calls on us to be the 'better' person (yes just like when your Mom told you to be the better person and turn the other cheek away from the playground bully, that kind of better person).
We have to learn to accept that we'll never receive the apology we felt we needed in order to make sense of the bad things that happened to us and we have to decide to offer up forgiveness regardless and let it go.
I know that kind of forgiveness in particular isn't easy. I have people in my life that make my skin crawl with the knowledge that I've had to be the better person. I forgave them - it doesn't mean I forgot what they did. I didn't say if you forgave someone that it meant you had to have them back in your life (okay some you can't get rid of but there are others you can cut ties with). But forgiveness puts you in control of the boundary between yourself and the person causing you harm. Boundaries mean you get decide what you will allow in your life and in that way you protect yourself.
But besides all of the above, and what I really want to say here is that forgiving yourself first is the most important step.
Even if it takes you a long time to find forgiveness for others please just learn to forgive yourself. You will make mistakes, big and small, but mistakes nonetheless. If we learn to ease up a little on ourselves then we will learn to live in the present moment and appreciate the moment rather then constantly beating ourselves up over mistakes we've made in the past or being to afraid to move forward for fear of what we may do wrong in the future.
I forgive myself.
Love Always