We all have fears... big and small fears.... Sometimes we allow them to overwhelm us, only to discover later that it really wasn't something to fear at all. We survive, we push on, we conquer.
- Like all parents the fear of burying one of my children before me would be my number one fear. I think this is a natural fear. As your children get older and you have to loosen the reigns and let them fly free you realise how little control you have over their decisions and you have to simply hope the guidance you gave them will help them make the right choices.
- Another big one for me as I've gotten older is the death of my parents. As a parent myself and reaching the age when I thought my parents were 'ancient' I realise that they will not live forever and it breaks my heart to think of not having them around. You only really appreciate your parents and all they sacrificed for you as you get older and face the same decisions and choices they had to make.
- Panic attacks... they strike without warning, are debilitating and soul destroying. If I could find a way to predict them and hide before they strike I would.
- Being trapped underwater. Hate the thought of all that water pushing against me and not being able to find my way out.
- Driving. I'm not a fan of cars. I'm not a fan of driving. In my opinion it is a necessary evil in the world we live in today but I did manage to avoid it for 10 years...
- The lost of my physical capabilities ahead of my mental .... I cannot bear the thought of being trapped in a body that no longer functions but a mind which is as active as what it is today.
- My children not finding their way in this world. It is a cruel world and they will have it so much tougher than my generation or that of my parents did. The legacy left to them is one of a planet in free fall, economies failing, no job security, instant gratification and no sense of family connections.
- The loss of my passion for photography and writing - 2 outlets that have kept me sane in the last 2 years.
Some of these fears I can control. Some control me at times. All I can do is focus on each day as it comes and move through it as smoothly as I can.